My Pre-Purchase Justification of Luxury Bags

Sometimes, I found myself starring at my laptop screen for quite a while. I wasn’t starring at 9Gag or Bored Panda, I was starring at one famous online shop that carries branded bags. I started off browsing the site just to see what is the current trend like, and then I bumped to rows of bags.Take a look of these beauties I am eyeing below!

This is not the first time I get some sort of  “dilemma”. Years ago, my dilemma was solved in almost an instance, because I didn’t have that much money to spend on a branded bag and I hated buying stuff with credit card. But now, when I have the money to spend on Gucci, Prada, whatever brand I want, I find myself in a deeper level of dilemma.

Every time I wanted to buy an expensive bag, I have to sleep it off. Then I have to answer my “pre-purchase” questions such as; do I really need it? why do I need it? is it just because I want to show it off? is it really necessary? will my life change when I tote this particular bag or will I become an arrogant person instead? I barely able to answers these questions, especially the part where I asked myself, what can I do for the society, with this amount of money I am about to spend on a bag? I am almost ashamed of myself trying to justify my purchase.

There are many people who just simply love to buy branded bags but I am not here to judge them. I have few  friends who happens to own few Hermes bags but are still down to earth and loves to do charity works. I do think that they are way better at managing their finance than me and I really should learn from them!

There are also some studies about the psychological explanation behind luxury brands here and here  which I think are quite true, especially for me. I constantly talking to myself that toting a Chanel bag will definitely boost my self-confidence (as the bag have been perceived as a luxurious brand successful people carries around) but is not like I don’t have self-confidence at all, right?

Don’t get me wrong, I do want to buy myself few classic luxury bags that I could pass down to my daughter, granddaughter and so on, but that will only come after securing our daughter’s education fund, house fund, donation and other funds that really matters. For now, as long as the bag is made of a good quality leather, I’ll definitely wears it with confidence!

The Life After The Drop Out

I have made a life-changing decision when I was studying in the best university in Indonesia. Being accepted in this top rank university was not without a struggle. I was having hard times going to different study group after school ends, 5 days a week, until 7 pm. Not to mention the 3 hours drive from school to my home at that time, as we were living on the outskirt of Jakarta, so I got home at around 9 on daily basis. I remembered the day I “compete” with hundreds of thousand students, trying my best to achieve the highest score to be eligible for student admittance. I also remembered the day I was accepted by the university. Me and my parents were literally chasing the newspaper guy to get the earliest morning paper as the result was always been announced through newspaper. I was so happy, I cried and didn’t stop mumbling to God on how grateful I am.

My life as a student in a high rank university was pretty normal. I skipped classes once in a while, hang out in the canteen instead of library, I failed some classes thinking that I can retake them anytime. I had my ups and downs in term of credit score. I had my 3.8 out of 4 as my highest credit score in a semester but I also had my 2.2. In total, my average score was around 2.8 – 3.0. Not bad, normal, and average was what best describes my life as a university student.

Then, one day I got a job and it changed my life forever. I was pushing myself to do both study and work at the same time. It was really a struggle for me as my lesson ends at 2pm and at the same time my work starts at 2pm. I started to skip afternoon classes to arrive to work earlier and although I tried to keep up with studying at work, it was clear to me that I enjoyed working more than being a student. So I decided to resign from the university. It was a dumb decision, if I think about it now, but hey, the past is the past.

So right after I chose to be focused on working, I encountered a lot of unpleasant experience. People started to judge me as someone who’s not worth paying attention to, even at work, no one were willing to listen to me because I didn’t have a degree. At that time, I was shocked and frustrated by how the society can just simply hold a long label against me; drop-out girl – stupid – don’t listen – she knows nothing – stay away. I didn’t understand how could someone judge a person by the degree they have accomplished. Does a degree makes a person more superior than those who have no degree? What gives you the right to underestimate anyone in the world? Why does a degree even considered as a prove of one’s existence? I honestly was so mad at the situation, I was so angry that I decided to try my hardest to prove them wrong, to prove every single person who have ever looked down on me, that I can do better, much better than them, degree holder.

I started to learn a lot of things. I drowned myself in various books, philosophy, classic literature, history, biology even quantum physics. I slept at 4 am everyday, intoxicated with excessive caffeine ( 4 to 5 glasses of coffee on daily basis) and was very determined to finish one book in 3 days. I digested all information I found on the internet, about software, computer hardware, current technology even politics. I took numerous online courses to keep up with God knows what. At this point, buying books made me feel comfortable, a feeling of “okay, now I have something to feed my brain with, I will not be as stupid as I was yesterday“. I felt like a complete failure, ashamed, worthless human being, a leftover of the society, all because I do not have a degree (thanks, society!)

Still to this day, I have never been satisfied with myself. Every morning before my work time starts, I read all the website listed on my bookmark bar, from left to right. This bookmark bar is manually reordered once in a week to make sure I receive all the knowledge I need. I push myself to read whitepaper, pdf, research and case studies downloaded to my phone, daily. My determination to learn does not stop here. I still signed up to different courses in Udemy, Ed-Ex and Coursera. I didn’t only took the courses that will keep me upfront in my work field, but also other subjects like economics even programming. I don’t believe in limitation of knowledge and I don’t believe in limiting myself in learning. I am furiously hungry for knowledge BUT I am also constantly in battle to prove myself that I am good enough and smart enough for me, myself and I. For most people, being a self motivated, self driven and high achiever is a good thing, for me it does do me good but it also have its bad side, as everything excessive does more harm than good.

Despite all the struggle I am facing, I do not regret the road that I took in the past. It was hard and bumpy hell of a ride, but I am sure that what lies at the end of this road, will be worth struggling for and perhaps, what makes a skillful driver is a long rocky bumpy road, right? Anyways, I am starting to enjoy proving people that they are wrong to have underestimated me, their look is just priceless *wink*

The Story Behind Ms.Techie

I wrote my first article on technology  in Fashionese Daily website, a part of Female Daily Network,  the place where I had been given the chance to write and explore myself (thank you!!!) . My first review was on Samsung Galaxy Note, it was a hands on. I remember how exciting it was and I couldn’t let go of it. To have a new gadget on my hand, to experience it first hand before anyone else, was something for me and to gain trust from tech brands, to review their products, means a lot to me 🙂

So, why do I decided to be Ms.Techie?

We all know that women who works in IT companies are called “IT-Chick” but it was a term that’s already widely use. I want something different. Some people told me that I am “techie“, well other than “geek” which for me sounds more intimidating. Techie wasn’t even a term that I was familiar with, but when I looked it up on dictionary; techie apparently means “a person who is very knowledgeable or enthusiastic about technology and especially high technology“. I am not very knowledgeable nor resourceful, but I do love technology and I am the kind of person who is enthusiastically wanting to learn about it. I even enrolled myself into several online courses so that I can understand a little bit better. I mean, I am a nobody in tech industry and to understand about  mobile technology, computer, processor etc, I have to learn from the very basic and just keep on learning… and it will never stop, I can’t never stop learning really. It’s a long quest and as you can see, technology is not something that will ever gonna stop. So most probably, the day I stop learning is the day I die!

Anyways, yes it is weird even for me, to stand out and “market” myself as Ms.Techie. First, I thought it will be nice to differentiate myself from others, in social media. So I started using hashtag (#MsTechie) on my technology related pictures on Instagram and Twitter. But then, I decided to acknowledge myself and although it is hard to gain this kind of confidence, I start seeing myself as Ms.Techie. Most of people maybe would think, “who are you to say you’re techie?“. Well, I decided not to care much about what people thinks. The day I decided to have my own personal branding as Ms.Techie, was the day I finally appreciated myself. It was a long rough journey for me to finally able to gain a slight confident in tech world and the good thing is, most of people I met who works in IT or are tech editors or journalists, do believe in me. They willingly teach me a lot of things, they patiently answers my dumb “basic” questions, they never see me as an annoying little princess, they inspires me.

Besides, when what I wrote gets me to a place where I have never been before, shouldn’t it be considered as acknowledgement? I am not a hardcore technical reviewer (one day, I will be though!), but I do feel the same excitement and thrill whenever I get a new device to review as any other tech reviewer will. I still have so much to learn, but you know what, I am Ms.Techie, I believe I can do because this is what I love to do and what I do best..I hope you’re with me!!  🙂

as Ms.Techie

Welcoming Myself to WordPress!

Nooooo I am not deleting my personal blog here, I just want to separate my techie post  from my personal blog. You know, putting things into perspective :p I hope my “website” here is much easier and less complicated, because there are lot of people that sent me messages (feedback) telling me that my personal blog is really complicated, I tend to write everything there…fashion, tech, politics yep, confusing, just like the owner here 😀

Anyways, I hope my new website here it’s enjoyable enough. I am not trying to be a die hard tech writer here, I am still learning and I know that I know nothing  🙂

-Ayu Putri-